Eating for Self-Synchronization

When you eat out of hunger, you tune in to yourself. When you eat in response to cravings, you tune in to the environment.

Try this: some time this week contrast and compare craving-driven eating and hunger-driven eating.On a scheduled craving-driven eating day, eat each and every time you have a craving.On a scheduled hunger-driven eating day, eat only if you are hungry.

Notice a process of social and environmental synchronization.When you eat in a craving-driven fashion, you eat each and every time the environment presents you with a powerful enough stimulus to elicit a craving in you.As a result, you become attuned to the environment, eating in sync, as if line-dancing with a crowd of strangers.Everybody eats, and you eat.

Compare this with a different kind of synchronization, self-synchronization (synchronization with your self), when you eat in a hunger-driven manner.While you begin to feel progressively out of sync with the environment (everybody eats, but you don’t), you begin to appreciate a sense of your behavior becoming synchronized with your intentions.Notice what feels better to you.

Don’t get me wrong:I am not suggesting that you forever eat all by yourself. No. I am just pointing out the cost associated with social eating.Social eatingconnects us to others and disconnects us from ourselves. That’s just the reality of it. After all, while we can sync our watches, we can’t quite sync our hunger. As a result, at least one person at the table will be eating out of sync with themselves. On some days it might feel more important for you to connect with others than with yourself. On those days, eating while not hungry (just because someone else has triggered you to crave) might be an acceptable price to pay for the psychological benefits of social company. On other days, perhaps, not. Knowing what you need more (to connect with yourself or with others) when you need it is part of balanced self-care.

copyright/pavel somov, ph.d.

One in Five Young Adults Has Mental Health Disorder

Nearly one in five adults under age 25 suffers from a psychiatric disorder such as obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) or social anxiety disorder. However, less than 25 percent of these individuals seeks help.

These findings come as the result of more than 5000 face-to-face interviews with students and non-students age 19 to 25. When substance abuse was counted in these figures, nearly half of the subjects suffered from a mental health disorder. College students were less likely to have substance abuse problems or suffer from bipolar disorders, but were otherwise equally as likely to experience mental health problems.

What Do Happy People Talk About?

Bobby McFerrin may have been wrong when he sang, "Don't worry, be happy." A new study shows that people who tackle heavy topics in daily conversation actually report higher levels of happiness than those who keep it light.

University of Arizona researcher Mathias R. Mehl had 79 undergraduates wear an Electronically Activated Recorder, or EAR, for three days. The EAR recorded 30 seconds of sound every 12.5 minutes. Researchers coded snippets of conversations picked up by the recorders according to whether the participant was alone or with others and whether the conversation was small talk, substantive, or other. Overall, about 18 percent of conversations qualified as small talk while 35.5 percent were substantive.

Twice in a three week interval participants also completed an inventory on how satisfied they were with their lives and were asked to assess the statement "I see myself as someone who is happy, satisfied with life."

One result from the study showed what previous studies have also shown: People who spent more time with others were happier. However the study also revealed that those who spent less time engaging in small talk and more time talking about substantial issues also experienced higher levels of well-being. Compared to the least happiest participants, the happiest in the study spent 25 percent less time alone and 70 percent more time talking, engaging in twice as much substantive talking and about one third the amount of small talk.

Whether there is a cause and effect relationship between talking about heavy topics and being happy remains to be seen. People who talk about more substantial things may, for example, be happier due to already existing intimacies in their lives. Next up, Dr. Mehl plans to investigate whether prescribing these sorts of conversations leads to an increase in well-being.

In the meantime you may want to dig a little deeper before your next conversation turns to the weather forecast.

همه دارند مي روند يا به فكر رفتند....

خوشحالم از اينكه در مملكتي زندگي مي كنم كه آدم را وادار مي كند هميشه يادش بماند كه هيچ كس قرار نيست تا ابد برايت بماند....اين روزها به چشمها ي هر دوست كه نگاه مي كنم يك سريال كامل از روز بدرقه اش در فرودگاه تا بيست سال بعدش كه با يك بچه به بغل در كنار يك همسر مو بور خواهم ديدش (اگر ببينم) در ذهنم مرور مي شود....نگاهم در هر نگاهي كه گره مي خورد ...دستم در هر دستي كه فشرده مي شود و صدايم در هر صدايي كه گم مي شود مرا به ياد روزي مي اندازد كه اين دوست نخواهد بود...اين صدا...اين نگاه ...اين دستها نخواهند بود

اين روزها روزها ي غريبي است. غريب ترين بهار زندگيم را تجربه مي كنم.... دارم بزرگ مي شوم ...دارم ياد مي گيرم روي پاهاي خودم راه بروم ....با صداي خودم حرف بزنم..با چشمهاي خودم ببينم.... ..با .... و تجربه همه ي اينها به يكباره به تنهايي كمي غريب است و جديد و ....